Is this proof that even the A-list do not look good in edgy, high-fashion dresses? LIZ JONES says the sartorial disasters on show at the Metropolitan Museum’s Costume Institute Gala in New York this week prove designers can’t dress real women.
Here are her withering verdicts...
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Ruffling feathers: In her black spider's web fishtail gown by Givenchy, Beyonce looks wide as an ocean liner. It's just awful! The transparent material and detailing make her ample behind look huge. But I love her sleek hair
Snakes alive! Rihanna almost looks classy for a change â€" while her Tom Ford dress has a plunging back and split skirt, at least she isn’t flaunting any bumcleavage. Shame the fabric makes her resemble a big serpent
Winging it: Christina Ricci is drowned by her Thakoon gown, whose floor-skimming satin bow simply swamps her petite frame
Frou-frou much: Royal wedding dress designer Sarah Burton for Alexander McQueen must have lost her marbles making this over-egged, flouncy gown for singer Florence Welch. Kate Middleton, look away
Fish out of water: Carey Mulligan’s halterneck metallic fishscales dress by Prada makes her look like
Scary Mulligan. I love the sticky-out skirt, though. Right, a close-up of the marine monstrosity
And so to bed: Sarah Jessica Parker made a brave choice in Valentino Haute Couture, but the fabric is too reminiscent of a Winceyette nightie - and there are yards too much of it
Scrap it! It isn’t just male designers who fail to flatter women â€" Stella McCartney’s metallic sheath gives Cameron Diaz a waist as thick as David Beckham’s brain
Missing the Marc: Style icon Alexa Chung's Marc Jacobs dress is too much like a shiny pinafore, given the white shirt. What is she trying to hide? Psoriasis?
Barely there: Victoria's Secret model Anja Rubik has no discretion. Where are her pants? I hate the jutting hip bones and the bandage effect of her Anthony Vaccarello gown
Stairway to hell: Scarlett Johansson struggles with the steps in her Dolce Gabbana, proving these high-fashion dresses might be beautiful - but they won't get you from A to B
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I hate how Liz Jones blames the designers!!! You forget that the people wearing the dress chose to and the designers don't force them to!!! The people wearing the dress think they look good in it, or they wouldn't wear it, and the designers don't force the people to wear it! If you have a need to blame someone for what you think is a bad dress, please blame the people who chose to wear the dress and not the designers who didn't force the dress on the people!!! I think, not that anyone cares, that real women are all different shapes and sizes, just because someone is skinny doesn't mean their not a real women!
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I love this event... Favorite part is seeing them all cling to dear life and whiteknucle it up those dreaded stairs... Priceless
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Alexa Chung's outfit is vile, but so is the remark about a horrible debilitating disease that makes sufferers' lives utterly miserable. All the frocks are pretty ghastly, the frou-frou number is particularly hideous, but Christina Ricci's over-excited bow wins the prize for truly ridiculous and totally dreadful in execution. Anya's dress looks scissored at random from lining fabric.
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"What is she trying to hide? Psoriasis?" Why would it matter? It's hardly a crime to have psoriasis. More to the point, what is Liz Jones trying to hide with all the airbrushing in her byline pic?
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I remember Givenchy's designs for Audrey Hepburn which were stylish, modest and utterly stunning. What on earth happened to that look???
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Skinny women and curvy women are REAL WOMEN! Just because you have curves, doesn't mean you're the ONLY real woman.
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"What is she trying to hide, Psoriasis?" What an ignorant comment, I have a skin condition which means I cannot be exposed to more than a couple of minutes of sunlight. I am not saying that is why Alexa is wearing a high collared, long sleeved shirt, but to make a joke at the expense of someone like me I think is unacceptable. Some people have no choice to wear things to cover up and to make a joke of them is incredibly insulting. Psoriasis or a skin condition like mine may not seem a big deal to most people but it has taken over my life and makes most of it miserable. I have no summer, no holiday, very limited social life, and feel self conscious enough when I have to wear head to toe clothing without confirmation from Liz Jones that people are laughing at me. Think Liz. You are not the only one with problems. - Hermit, UK, 09/05/2012 11:56 I thought sunlight was supposed to help in some cases?!? My son suffers, as did I in my teens. Anyone with psoriasis gets my sympathy.
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"Heath, London, 9/5/2012 14:49Â…Â….Â… The Met Gala, is OFTEN dubbed as ' the oscars of fashion'. - Anon, Nowhere, 9/5/2012 8:04" I meant that unlike the film Oscars, stars are not meant to wear 'safe' glamour for the Met :-)
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For once I agree, except for the Stella McCartney dress, I think it is the only classy dress in this line up, I do not agree that it makes the waist look thicker..
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Liz - we women go around blaming men for the pressure to look young and beautiful 24/7, but quite honestly, it's actually people like you that ravage female self-esteem. I know you're getting paid for it - but please, feel ashamed.
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